Stoneywood Dyce v. Portcullis - Sunday, 21 May, 2017

Toss was won by Portcullis, who chose to field.

Stoneywood Dyce : 230 for 4.

Portcullis : 124 for 9.

Lads Army beats Dads Army!

The second ever R&D (Recreational and Development) North League for Portcullis saw them once again on their merry travels as this new league took them to another ground they would not get near in the Grades. The venue this time – Peoples Park – home of Stoneywood Dyce.

It was a case of the youngsters from Stoneywood Dyce would take on the oldsters of Portcullis. The clear majority of this Stoneywood Dyce side would be in their teens whilst the clear majority of the Portcullis side would be in their beds – suffering various ailments from hangovers to hip replacements!

Due to the vast differences in age, the Portcullis posse got into a bit of panic. The “Just For Men” (in my case “Just For Ginge”) was liberally applied (to those of us who have hair) and the passports (well we were near the airport) had the date of births re-adjusted as the age gulf was frantically trying to be dramatically reduced. Treasurer, and Captain for the day, Bob Adie was apoplectic with rage when, on going into the Portcullis kit bag, found that the seasons supply of “Oil of Ulay” had evaporated (not that he needs it anyway you understand).

Despite these futile and, quite frankly, embarrassing efforts it was always going to be a case of “Lads Army v Dads Army”!

Bob Adie, in his role of Captain Mainwaring, won the first battle for the team by winning the toss and electing to field first. Stoneywood Dyce would have to bat first.

It was to be our only victory of the day.

Bob opened the bowling with himself and debutant Brian Harper. The batting for Stoneywood Dyce was opened by Stuart Lister and Andrew MacLaren. The Stoneywood pair made a dashing start getting to 31 in quick time before young Lister was out bowled by a inswinger from Harper that came back in and clipped the top of middle stump. Lister gone for a lively 19 that include four fine fours.

The wickets dried up for a long time as new batsmen Jordan Squire joined MacLaren at the crease. Portcullis rotated their bowling, bringing on Andy Philip, Simon Winstanley and Alan Burnett but, one well dug out Yorker by Squire from Winstanley apart, the Stoneywood pair made hay and carted the Portcullis posse around the park.

Both players batted quite splendidly and duly got their fifties and retired. McLaren made 50 (5x4) whilst Squire made 52 (8x4) as the runs piled on.

This brought the pairing of Jack Lambley and Ed Freeman to the crease. Freeman was a tad unlucky as a mistimed drive from the bowling of Shovon Mostofa saw it return to the bowler for a simple caught and bowled. New batsman E. Milne also sadly failed to trouble the scorers as Ross McKenzie got him to clip one towards point. Andrew Blackwell on hand to clutch onto a sound catch,

Jack Lambley made a nippy 14 (3x4) before becoming Mostofa’s second victim. Owen Thorpe taking a good catch. And that was about it for Portcullis.

The pairing of Ewan Davidson 37 not out (4x4) and Andrew MacLean 25 not out (2x4) were the last batsmen for Stoneywood Dyce, the pair taking the Stoneywood Dyce total to a colossal 230-4 at the end of their final innings. Richard Collinson, Ronnie Falconer and Andy Phillip also got onto bowl but they too got carted round the park as these youngsters were in the mood to pounce on anything loose.

For Portcullis, Mostofa finished with 2-17 from five overs whilst Brain Harper (1-18) and Ross McKenzie (1-26) were the other wicket takers.

After a fine tea, it was the turn of Portcullis to post a reply. Bob Adie decided to open with Andrew Blackwell and Owen Thorpe whilst Stoneywood Dyce opened the bowling with Ed Freeman and E Milne.

Thorpe was first to go, trapped lbw from the impressive bowling of young Freeman. Blackwell hung around long enough to smash two of his trademark mid-on boundaries to make an impressive 16 before losing his bearings by getting himself run out after a popped shot from his bat was dropped.

The other scores of note were Richard Collinson with 22 (2x4) and Alan Burnett 17 who retired. Every batsman did make runs though as Portcullis finished their 40 overs on 124-8.

Pick of the bowlers for Stoneywood Dyce was Ed Freeman with 2-7 from six overs. He bowled with good pace for one so young. His second wicket a pearler as he bowled a fine in-swinger that gripped the pitch just outside off-stump and came back to beat the staunch defences of Falconer. The other wicket takers were Mark Lambley (2-12), Andrew MacLaren (1-6), Jack Lambley (1-11) and Stuart Lister (1-14).

I would like to say, that on the back of such a heavy defeat 106 run defeat, that Stoneywood Dyce had a couple of ringers.

But I would be lying.

Their youngsters bowled and batted extremely well and their fielding was exceptional! One catch from Jack Lambley to dismiss Mostofa was exceptional. Mostofa scooped it over Lambley’s head at gully and it looked well beyond him. He responded quick enough, and with tremendous agility leapt backwards to take the Most stunning once hand catch inches from the ground!

Towards the end of the match one of the Stoneywood Dyce lads said:

“This is the Stoneywood Firsts of the future right here”

It was said through sheer enthusiasm and may appear to be a tad optimistic at the first hearing. As an ex- betting shop manager and part time odds compiler, I would not bet against this though! They all played extremely well and if they continue their development at Stoneywood Dyce they surely will.


RICHARD COLLINSON takes the plaudits this week for his fine knock of 22. Loan signing from Dunecht Alan Burnett (17) and Andrew Blackwell (16) deserve mentions as well.


JORDAN SQUIRE takes it for his fine unbeaten 52. The rest of the Stoneywood lads also deserve a mention as they all played very well today.


More players bowled (21) in this match than batted (18). Only Andrew Blackwell, through his own choice, did not bowl in this match. The true spirit of this R&D League is right there in that sentence!!

Thursday, 25 May, 2017

Innings of Stoneywood Dyce

#NameR46How OutBowlerKeeperFielderComments
1A.McLaren505Retired Out
3J.Squire528Retired Out
6E.Davidson375Not out
8A.McLean252Not out
9G.RobertsonDid not bat
10M.LambleyDid not bat
11C.CartwrightHandled the Ball
Leg Byes3
No Balls0

Innings of Portcullis

#NameR46How OutBowlerKeeperFielderComments
2A.Blackwell162Run Out
5A.Burnett17Retired Out
7B.Harper5Not out
11B.Adie1Not out
Leg Byes0
No Balls4